By Chris McCallum, Founder of Truth-Based Sports
What is a Game?
According to philosopher Bernard Suits (1978), the definition of a game is the common acceptance of unnecessary obstacles. This concept might sound ridiculous – why would anyone accept an inefficient path to achieve random and unnecessary outcomes? Yet, people spend extensive amounts of time (and money) practicing, playing, watching, and obsessing over just such ridiculousness as sport. Why?
In sport, failure is often regarded as a negative outcome. In my experience, this perspective is harmful and contradictory to the true purpose of sport. If, we accept Suits’ definition then failure is something to be overcome, rather than avoided. With this mindset, what I call the “infinite game” emerges: the continuous cycle of failing, learning, and growing to eventually overcome. No failure is final; results are simply data to inform how we proceed in future challenges. This mindset can also then serve us in the “game of life,” where the stakes are much more real and consequential.
Purpose Gives Belonging
As sport educators, we need to define our own purpose within the games we teach to create a culture that players can be belong to. It is often deeply personal and should be based on intentional reflection on our own experiences in sport. When we open ourselves up to tell personal and relatable stories, we empower ourselves and others to connect not only through shared human experience but through a common purpose. Yeager (2024) defines a belonging narrative as having four elements:
- Struggle is normal.
- Change is possible.
- Actions are to be taken for change.
- Our actions will compound into positive change, but we must be patient.
My Belonging Narrative
I have leveraged my own belonging narrative to help identify the struggle in front of me, recognize where and how change can occur, and focus on positive impact over time as my legacy. During my competitive years as an athlete, I had two distinct and different experiences.
My first team experience was profoundly positive, full of growth, learning, and great connection through common purpose and care for one another. Even though our coaches were not as experienced and our team had not been developed to the point where we attracted top players we were highly engaged and had established a foundation for growth! Our team’s “being,” was to behave and feel like champions daily. We were not achieving the outcomes that indicated success to the outside world but it was a winning experience.
In my second team experience, I played with players who were bigger, faster, stronger, and more experienced. The coaches were masters of X’s and O’s, thinking in progressions of play three, four, five steps ahead in every scenario. The team had a history of winning. They were always top 3 in standings, held many league all-stars on the roster, and almost always advanced to the championship game of their league play, if not winning it all each year.
Though the external success was obvious to everyone, being on this team was not a positive experience for me. Though everyone on the team was talented in their own right, we found ourselves in constant comparison to one another. We competed for status through playing time and statistical categories. Though the coaches were experienced in X’s and O’s, they weren’t so interested in the “Jimmies and the Joes”. We were often pitted in competition with one another every day, without clear reasons. It was not uncommon to see half the roster replaced year to year. It was a zero-sum game on this team! This experience was short-lived for me and left me falling out of love with sport.
Lessons in My Narrative
Years later, becoming a teacher, I found my capacity to create impact grew greatly in coaching sport. I saw I had the capability to serve young people who were a lot like me. But I witnessed again that not all impact is positive, and not all learning environments are created equal.
In my first years as a head coach, I was able to quickly build what outsiders would deem a success in a short period of time. After all, I was quite an experienced player and it was easy for me to upskill athletes. Soon we were competitive, finding ourselves at the top of regular season standings – but we couldn’t seem to make the jump from semi-final to champion. And that was what I was focused on.
A Pivotal Turning Point
In one of those early seasons, it all came to a head. We were hosting the final tournament and I assumed the players would appreciate that opportunity and be engaged. My team was a mess the whole weekend. They arrived late, left early, and/or did not attend games or events. It was clear through their choices, the players felt no responsibility to me, the team, or the game. We played the last-place game – a gross underachievement for this group – with only half my roster present.
When looking across to the championship game, there was a team that was the antithesis of ours. But what they lacked in physicality, they made up for in their collective presence and spirit. It was clear from the moment they arrived that they were together. The students had organized their own attire for travel and events to indicate this and even organized coaches to have matching t-shirts and ties. From their first game through to the final, it became very clear they were not there for the sole purpose of winning a tournament. They were there to have fun and grow together. The coaches didn’t say a single word to referees through the whole tournament unless it was “hello” or “thank you”. They focused on encouraging their kids while also making highly effective tactical adjustments that would best serve their team context. When players were removed from play, they acknowledged the teammate taking their place and went to listen to their coach for feedback. They were there to help the team. It was masterful!
Through reflection, I realized I had seen this before. I had lived it. My failure as a coach was to take my eye off my purpose: positive impact and growth. In that moment, I realized that I needed to be much more intentional in my coaching.
So, What is Your Belonging Narrative?
In the end, sport is not just about games won or lost. It is about how we show up, how we grow together, and the legacy of belonging we leave behind.
What experiences, challenges and failures define your purpose? How does that inform how you create impact? What do you see as the legacy that will be built through your impact over time?
For me, that reflection gave birth to Truth Based Athletics. My purpose is to support schools, organizations, and sport educators in creating intentionally positive learning experiences through sport.
To be truly intentional, we need to align two related, but distinct disciplines:
- Philosophy: the shared human experience.
- Psychology: The study of human behaviour and its application to our environments for thriving.
Harvard Psychologist in the field of happiness, performance and leadership, Arthur Brooks (as cited in Gervais, M., 2024) states that by recognizing the philosophical, we begin to ask the right questions. Then, shifting to the psychological, we seek answers, test their validity, and confirm the most effective approaches to create motivational and impactful learning environments. This results in a coaching framework based in purpose, impact and sustainability:
- Defining and Aligning on a Common Purpose (Philosophy: Purpose-Vision-Mission-Standards)
- Evaluating and Elevating Approaches for Impact (Psychology: Goals-Memory-Motivation)
- Assessing and Revamping Systems for Sustainability (Psychology: Application/Legacy Building)
Because when we play the infinite game, the real victory is not the scoreboard. It’s the culture of belonging we create and the lives we shape long after the final whistle – win or lose.
Chris McCallum, founder of Truth-Based Sports, is a passionate sport educator, administrator, coach, and consultant dedicated to empowering organizations, administrators, coaches, and students to unlock their full potential and develop strong character and leadership through a psychologically informed, “Truth Based” approach to co-curricular sport and activity.”
References
Gervais, M. (2024, November 13). The Science of happiness: Arthur Brooks on building a fulfilling life (Episode 479) [Podcast]. The Finding Mastery Podcast.
Suits, B. (1978). The Grasshopper: Games, Life and Utopia. Toronto, Ontario: University of Toronto Press
Yeager, D. S. (2024). 10 to 25: the science of motivating young people : a groundbreaking approach to leading the next generation–and making your own life easier (First Avid
Reader Press hardcover edition.). Avid Reader Press, an imprint of Simon & Schuster, LLC.